Quill & Parchment: Name That Tune

Name That Tune
by Katie Sontag
–for Sherman Alexie

How is this morning different
from all others? My teakettle whistles
the opening bars of Perry Mason's
theme song, my toast pops up
to Gidget, my bathtub jets blow
Procol Harum's "Whiter Shade of Pale",
the pic through my husband's curls
unfurls Verdi's Requiem, the fluffed
pillows on my grandmother's easy chairs
sink to Bing Crosby and Doris Day
dreaming of a "White Christmas"
while I prepare for Native Lit & Film
then turn the ignition over to Simon
& Garfunkle's "Scarborough Fair"
and sing solo to the snowy insistence
of my windshield wipers Country Joe's
Vietnam Rag, And it's one, two, three,
What are we fighting for?– the first
squeak of chalk on the blackboard
Jack Benny's egregious violin,
my lecture notes about the politics
of Dances With Wolves falling
from the lectern then rising
to Copland's "Appalachian Spring",
student footsteps up the stairs
all orchestral buffalo bravado
as Kevin Costner saves the Sioux
from starvation, his ear bent low
to the prairie and everyone scrambles
for a seat, the ancient rumble
of drum circles the beat I want to follow,
oh what the hell, I break into falsetto,
white girl on a white day in a mostly
white class, chanting my favorite
lyrics from Smoke Signals,
"John Wayne's teeth, hey-ya
John Wayne's teeth, hey-ya
Hey-ya, hey-ya, hey-ya, hey!
Are they false? Are they real?
Are they plastic? Are they steel?"
as if I had joined in with Victor
and Thomas at the back of the bus,
trying to spook the cowboys who'd
stolen our seats right out from under us,
as if it were the first and last song
on earth and I had stolen it right out
from under you, Sherman, claiming it
as my own, unable to get it out of my
head for years and years to come.

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