If Only
by Candace Turner

I prefer morning’s sleepy good-byes.
But damn it those 3 little words
often break through my barriers.
Their lips whisper them in my ear;
while my lips are occupied elsewhere.

I’ve never truly been “in love”
Or have I …
If only my younger self
knew the feeling
the 4-letter word meant.
I was certain passion,
shared laughter, daily routines
tackled by two
couldn’t possibly be love.

I missed it.
I missed my chance.
A lifetime of years later
I know exactly who
had captured my heart –
Flashbacks of wayward brown hair,
shy green-eyed invitations;
kindness worn as easily
as an old flannel shirt.

Perhaps the fact
that He/We can never be
allows me the safety to
say I loved him.


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