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Stirring Memories
by Kathy Grieger

I
I start a stir fry for dinner
Cup, kettle, basmati, I walk to the sink
As I try to measure, my mind will not share
Preparation proportions, ratio forgotten

One to two? Three to one? One to four?
I slide to the floor, feeling useless
Holding hope that the number     
will show itself soon

Glen finds me sobbing, still clutching                
the kettle. I choke out, “I can’t cook
anymore.” He soothes, “One to two,
I’ll make it, you rest.”            
As he helps me up, I hand him the pan       

II
Waking out of a seizure, I slide
tongue along teeth. Feeling space,
I get up, and move to the mirror
Trying to see where I’ve broken a tooth       

I stare at myself in frustration  
Unable to retrieve if this gap is new
I walk back to bed, hoping
Glen will stir memories

Hugging, he whispers, “Don’t worry
When you were seven, you had the tooth
pulled. The dentist sure it would
make room for others”
Finally calm, I fall fast asleep

III
Making granola bars,
I blend ingredients. I stir adding flour,
applesauce and oats. When I reach
for brown sugar, it’s missing

I trace steps and search. It is not
in the cabinet, or in the cupboard
Yanking open the door of the preheated
oven, I’m relieved it’s not melted in there

Knowing my habit of misplacing                       
things, a friend on the phone suggests       
checking the fridge. On the shelf I see
sugar, simply waiting for me. I laugh
and hang up, crack the eggs and continue

IV
Images
are indelible
I wait, knowing thoughts
must remain in my mind

Reflections may move me
from moment to moment
I search, stirring shadows,
seeking answers of time

Feeling foolish, I scavenge
from others. As I stir their           
memories, they become
one of mine   




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